HenchmenUnions
From Edition
December 13, 2007
[13:21] soeasilyamused: any computer pranks i were to play would be instantly traced back to me, so that's not the best idea [13:22] ChuckPunchDrunk: I understand [13:22] ChuckPunchDrunk: Listen carefully [13:22] ChuckPunchDrunk: Get a syringe [13:22] ChuckPunchDrunk: one with a thin needle [13:22] ChuckPunchDrunk: Buy fish from market [13:22] ChuckPunchDrunk: Inject seat cushions with fish juice [13:22] ChuckPunchDrunk: PROFIT [13:22] soeasilyamused: LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [13:23] ChuckPunchDrunk: its old-fashioned and will stump for a while [13:23] ChuckPunchDrunk: and then when they realize its her chair its coming from [13:24] soeasilyamused: EW [13:24] ChuckPunchDrunk: theyll never look at her the same again [13:24] soeasilyamused: EW EW EW [13:24] soeasilyamused: lol [13:24] soeasilyamused: that's awesome [13:24] ChuckPunchDrunk: and if youre lucky, some of it will transfer to her pants/skirt [13:25] DarkLadyotheSith: You're evil, Chuck. [13:26] ChuckPunchDrunk: It's evil for a good cause. [13:26] DarkLadyotheSith: Well, yes. [13:26] Katphyre: Heh, Jacob was sleepwalking. [13:26] DarkLadyotheSith: I need to find a way for DOS=SINGLE or an equivalent type command to work in XP/Vista [13:26] Katphyre: Yay for promethazine [13:27] MCoxC1: Hey mister Chuck! Can I have your autograph? [13:27] DarkLadyotheSith: Because that was a *great* prank. [13:27] Katphyre: poor kid. I really do feel bad for him...but he's much more pleasant when he's drugged nearly to passed out. [13:28] ChuckPunchDrunk: Evil for a good cause makes me good. [13:28] ChuckPunchDrunk: WIN [13:28] DarkLadyotheSith: You just keep thinking that, Chuck. [13:29] ChuckPunchDrunk: I don't like your tone.... [13:29] ChuckPunchDrunk: MATT! SEIZE HER! [13:30] MCoxC1: *looks up with powdered sugar on his face, donut sticking out of his mouth* I'ng ong greah! [13:31] Katphyre: Mmmmm, powdered donut [13:31] Katphyre: I need some of those raspberry filled kind [13:31] ChuckPunchDrunk: -.- [13:31] ChuckPunchDrunk: good help is hard to find [13:31] MCoxC1: *swallow* They were out of Boston Creme. [13:32] MCoxC1: *flashes henchman's union card*( [13:34] ChuckPunchDrunk: I knew letting you guys go union was a mistake [13:34] ChuckPunchDrunk: LOOK AT MY LAIR! [13:34] ChuckPunchDrunk: It's EMPTY! [13:34] ChuckPunchDrunk: WHERE'S THE FREAKING DEATH LASER? [13:35] ChuckPunchDrunk: It's been like.. sixteen MONTHS. [13:35] DarkLadyotheSith: *whistles innocently* [13:35] soeasilyamused: LOL [13:35] DarkLadyotheSith: A little judicious hacking into your contractor's task order database does wonders, Chuck. ;) [13:36] DarkLadyotheSith: I appreciate you footing the bill, though. [13:36] ChuckPunchDrunk: And all this cabling...? Where does it even GO? It's just hanging out of the walls! Does it even DO anything? Can't we cover that with some drywal? [13:37] MCoxC1: That's the drywaller's job. [13:38] ChuckPunchDrunk: What? Why can't you do it? [13:38] ChuckPunchDrunk: All you do is eat doughnuts! [13:39] * soeasilyamused wipes tears of laughter from eyes [13:39] MCoxC1: I'm the donut guy. [13:39] MCoxC1: Union rules. [13:39] MCoxC1: I can't do another organization's job. [13:39] ChuckPunchDrunk: Donut guy?~! [13:39] DarkLadyotheSith: Nice job, Matt. [13:39] MCoxC1: Thanks Julie. [13:39] ChuckPunchDrunk: What the hell do I need a doughnut guy for? [13:39] ChuckPunchDrunk: I'm taking over the world for evil! [13:39] MCoxC1: *blink* [13:39] MCoxC1: Hello? [13:39] MCoxC1: Eats donuts? [13:39] ChuckPunchDrunk: Not opening a Kripsy Kreme! [13:39] DarkLadyotheSith: Yeah, he brings the donuts, and taste tests the donuts to make sure they're not poisoned. [13:39] MCoxC1: Can't have the drywall guy or the carpenter do it? [13:40] ChuckPunchDrunk: He doesn't even bring them! [13:40] ChuckPunchDrunk: *I* bring them! [13:40] ChuckPunchDrunk: And I don't even get to eat one! [13:40] MCoxC1: Got forbit the frickin' laser beam guy eating donuts??? [13:40] ChuckPunchDrunk: He eats them all! [13:40] DarkLadyotheSith: Well, you wouldn't want to eat one that's poisoned, would you? [13:41] DarkLadyotheSith: *admires shiny new death laser* [13:41] ChuckPunchDrunk: He even let that secret agent guy go last month! [13:41] ChuckPunchDrunk: Is that my death laser? [13:41] ChuckPunchDrunk: Why do you have a death laser? [13:41] MCoxC1: And they say there's no stupid questions... [13:42] MCoxC1: Death laser? Lases people to death. [13:42] MCoxC1: THINK! [13:42] MCoxC1: Jeese. [13:42] ChuckPunchDrunk: YOU! [13:42] ChuckPunchDrunk: Look at you! [13:42] ChuckPunchDrunk: You're covered in powered sugar! [13:42] ChuckPunchDrunk: No one could even tell your uniform is supposed to be black! [13:42] ChuckPunchDrunk: And where's your cowl?! [13:43] MCoxC1: If only we had black powdered sugar... [13:43] MCoxC1: Oh. I left it in the truck. [13:43] MCoxC1: It clashed with my shoes. [13:43] ChuckPunchDrunk: What happened to your boots?! [13:43] Jrh1406: they clashed with his cow [13:43] MCoxC1: l [13:43] DarkLadyotheSith: No, it's *my* death laser. But I appreciate your contribution to my cause. [13:43] MCoxC1: I don't have a cow, J. [13:44] Jrh1406: oh, cowl [13:44] MCoxC1: Cowboy gets the cow. Union. You know how it is. [13:44] Jrh1406: either way [13:44] DarkLadyotheSith: Safety Cow [13:44] ChuckPunchDrunk: Cause? [13:44] ChuckPunchDrunk: WHAT CAUSE? [13:44] ChuckPunchDrunk: YOU DON'T HAVE A CAUSE! [13:45] ChuckPunchDrunk: AND YOU! *points at Matt* [13:45] ChuckPunchDrunk: YOU'RE THE ONE THAT SIGNED ME UP FOR DIRECTV [13:46] ChuckPunchDrunk: I don't even watch TV! [13:46] ChuckPunchDrunk: I had TV Guys here! [13:46] ChuckPunchDrunk: This lair is supposed to be secret! [13:46] ChuckPunchDrunk: STOP EATING DOUGHTNUTS GODDAMIT [13:47] DarkLadyotheSith: I do too have a cause. [13:47] ChuckPunchDrunk: AND YOU STILL HAVEN'T SEIZED HER!!! [13:47] DarkLadyotheSith: He's not the seizing guy. He's the donut guy. [13:48] ChuckPunchDrunk: SILENCE! [13:48] Katphyre: besides you need a warrant for seizure [13:48] ChuckPunchDrunk: NOT IN MY AMERICA! [13:48] Bobcoffeyc1: heading home, nite all [13:48] *** Bobcoffeyc1 has left the chat. [13:49] soeasilyamused: at least your uniform shirt isn't red, Matt [13:49] DarkLadyotheSith: no, it's powdered sugar colored. [13:51] * ChuckPunchDrunk cries [13:51] MCoxC1: It's cool boss. I know the Directv guy. He got us the nudie channels for free. [13:52] ChuckPunchDrunk: really? [13:52] MCoxC1: Oh yeah. And the HDDVR for free. [13:52] MCoxC1: And Sunday Ticket. [13:52] ChuckPunchDrunk: Oh.. well, see. That's not so bad. [13:52] MCoxC1: The only downside is that when you rain fire down upon the world, we lose signal. [13:53] ChuckPunchDrunk: Well, she took my death laser. [13:53] DarkLadyotheSith: I did no such thing. [13:53] DarkLadyotheSith: I just changed the delivery address. [13:54] ChuckPunchDrunk: Howabout smothering her with doughnuts? Can you do that? It involves doughtnuts [13:54] DarkLadyotheSith: http://www.dcsmackdown.com/demo.html [13:55] MCoxC1: *checks contract* Yeah, I'm good with that. [13:55] MCoxC1: But I have to wait for my next shipment. [13:55] MCoxC1: We have ot use a union vendor. [13:55] MCoxC1: THey'll be here on the 5th of next month. [13:57] Choicedfuller: outies :D [13:57] ChuckPunchDrunk: v.v [13:57] *** Choicedfuller has left the chat. [13:57] DarkLadyotheSith: Hey, what'm I supposed to do with all these killdozer parts? [13:58] ChuckPunchDrunk: What happened to my killdozer? [13:58] Jrh1406: Hey Matt, did you see? Goons local 233 may be striking soon [13:58] DarkLadyotheSith: I dunno. I didn't end up with a killdozer. Just spare parts. [13:59] ChuckPunchDrunk: Strike? [13:59] ChuckPunchDrunk: You guys can't strike. [13:59] DarkLadyotheSith: Why not? They're union. [14:00] Jrh1406: hey, all we want is decent medical and a little vacation time, is that too much to ask? [14:00] ChuckPunchDrunk: WE'RE ON A REMOTE TROPICAL ISLAND. [14:00] ChuckPunchDrunk: EVERYDAY IS A VACATION! [14:00] ChuckPunchDrunk: ASK MATT! [14:00] ChuckPunchDrunk: ALL HE DOES IS EAT DOUGHNUTS! [14:00] Jrh1406: yeah, and we can't enjoy it, because every day it's move this big box, guard this door [14:01] ChuckPunchDrunk: BUT NO ONE EVER DOES IT! [14:01] DarkLadyotheSith: Eat this donut. [14:01] Jrh1406: hey, we do, but without vacation time to unwind, our guys tend to get a little wired out [14:01] ChuckPunchDrunk: How many secret British agents have come through that door?? Just in the past week! [14:01] Jrh1406: you've got goon squads running 12 hour shifts [14:02] ChuckPunchDrunk: OF SURFING! [14:02] MCoxC1: Well, sir, if you'd stop threatening to burn down Big Ben, they'd prob'ly taper off. [14:02] DarkLadyotheSith: Computer or water? [14:02] McSherrie: Mmmm... Donut... [14:02] Jrh1406: well, seeing as we don't even get computers, it's definatly not on the internet [14:03] MCoxC1: I go now. 4-6" of snow call me to be relocated. [14:03] Jrh1406: one of my guys had to use the big console in the other room to check up on his daughter the other day [14:03] ChuckPunchDrunk: What? What about all those boxes over there with the lights and the beeping and tape reels? [14:03] DarkLadyotheSith: Oh, so it's down in the shark pit? [14:03] ChuckPunchDrunk: I've got sharks? [14:03] Jrh1406: yeah, they're over there, in the underground grotto [14:03] DarkLadyotheSith: Well, I don't know if there are actual *sharks* as such. But you've got a pit. [14:03] MCoxC1: Oh yes. I'm friends with the shark tamer. [14:03] DarkLadyotheSith: My intelligence reports seem to be lacking.... [14:04] MCoxC1: OK. I GO NOW! [14:04] MCoxC1: Bubye! [14:04] ChuckPunchDrunk: Ta [14:04] Jrh1406: later [14:04] *** MCoxC1 has left the chat. [14:05] Jrh1406: I'm out too [14:05] *** Jrh1406 has left the chat. [14:05] DarkLadyotheSith: Your minions are abandoning you. [14:05] McSherrie: That is sad. [14:05] ChuckPunchDrunk: They always leave early. [14:05] ChuckPunchDrunk: Bunch of jerks [14:05] ChuckPunchDrunk: I can't fire them [14:05] DarkLadyotheSith: Union. [14:06] ChuckPunchDrunk: They have a contract. [14:06] DarkLadyotheSith: Kill 'em off? [14:06] ChuckPunchDrunk: It's not in the contract. [14:07] DarkLadyotheSith: C'mon, what kind of evil overlord are you leaving out the death clause in the contract? [14:07] soeasilyamused: this is SO going on the wiki.... [14:07] DarkLadyotheSith: *laugh* [14:08] ChuckPunchDrunk: I didn't have a lawyer to go over it. [14:08] ChuckPunchDrunk: Crafty union bastards. [14:09] DarkLadyotheSith: You need help chuck. [14:09] DarkLadyotheSith: http://www.eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html -- reread the primer. [14:09] e1y0gr4g: what kind of evil overlord doesn't employ (or happen to be) a lawyer? [14:09] DarkLadyotheSith: One lacking in wealth, I expect. [14:10] e1y0gr4g: i'm going home. [14:10] ChuckPunchDrunk: I'm an overlord with scruples. [14:10] McSherrie: Drive carefully! [14:10] e1y0gr4g: i will drive carefully. unlike on my drive in, the blackberry will stay holstered. (: [14:11] e1y0gr4g: today was insane. [14:11] McSherrie: lol [14:11] e1y0gr4g: i showed up at work in my slippers because the shit hit the fan just as i was about to leave to take the girls to school. [14:11] soeasilyamused: oy, that's never good :( [14:11] e1y0gr4g: planning to come back and finish getting ready. [14:11] McSherrie: Ouch! [14:12] DarkLadyotheSith: Loverly. [14:12] e1y0gr4g: so i am going home now to watch more stargate atlantis with my wife. [14:12] e1y0gr4g: and fetch her food and pills. (: [14:12] McSherrie: :-) That sounds like a wonderful evening. [14:12] soeasilyamused: aw, that's sweet :) [14:13] DarkLadyotheSith: I need to get into Atlantis one of these days. [14:13] McSherrie: I enjoy it a great deal. [14:13] DarkLadyotheSith: Still working through SG1. [14:13] e1y0gr4g: i've got seasons 1 & 2 on my hard drive, season 3 is on the way. [14:13] DarkLadyotheSith: Although I'm close to finishing. [14:13] DarkLadyotheSith: Is Atlantis still in production? [14:13] e1y0gr4g: yes, they're in season 4. [14:13] McSherrie: ... I have seasons 1-3 and all of 4 that has shown so far here. ;-) [14:14] e1y0gr4g: 12 episodes so far, i think. [14:14] e1y0gr4g: is it retrievable from my house, Gwen? it's downloading so slowly. [14:14] McSherrie: 10. :-D [14:14] e1y0gr4g: ah, maybe imdb is listing a couple that haven't aired yet. [14:14] McSherrie: Um, I have no FTP site, so sadly it is not. Sorry. [14:15] e1y0gr4g: bummer. [14:15] McSherrie: This Mortal Coil was shown last week. [14:15] e1y0gr4g: get someone to fix that. [14:15] Katphyre: there are deer down grazing in the yards of the condos on 98th, Shawn [14:15] McSherrie: lol I'll see what I can do. ;-) [14:15] e1y0gr4g: i hope they don't get hit. [14:16] Katphyre: yeah...me too. They look pretty but I'm sure they're a nuisance. [14:17] * e1y0gr4g storms the castle. [14:17] *** e1y0gr4g has left the chat. [14:18] DarkLadyotheSith: He'd better watch out for the shark pit. [14:18] ChuckPunchDrunk: I got sharks? [14:18] DarkLadyotheSith: Apparently. [14:19] DarkLadyotheSith: Better check and make sure you have remoras as well. [14:20] ChuckPunchDrunk: Are those robots? [14:20] DarkLadyotheSith: No, those are the shark-cleaning fish. Gotta keep your sharks healthy. [14:20] ChuckPunchDrunk: robot sharks? [14:20] DarkLadyotheSith: No clue. [14:21] DarkLadyotheSith: I haven't been *in* your shark pit. [14:21] McSherrie: With laser beams on their heads? [14:21] DarkLadyotheSith: That was sort of the point of finding out where it was, so I wouldn't have to find out if it was populated. [14:21] DarkLadyotheSith: Sharks or sharktacons, it's still bad to fall in. [14:22] ChuckPunchDrunk: hm [14:22] ChuckPunchDrunk: probably full of donut boxes [14:22] Cjm2576: bah weep grah nah weep ninny bhan [14:22] DarkLadyotheSith: *laugh* [14:22] DarkLadyotheSith: You'd have to ask Matt.
